A Wonderful Paradox!

“I want you to know, brothers, that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel, so that it has become known throughout the whole imperial guard and to all the rest that my imprisonment is for Christ.  And most of the brothers, having become confident in the Lord by my imprisonment, are much more bold to speak the word without fear.” Philippians 1:12-14

Have you ever heard the term “paradox?”  A paradox is, according to one definition is a statement, proposition, or situation that seems to be absurd or contradictory, but in fact is or may be true.  Whether you’re familiar with the term “paradox” or not, you are witness to them all of the time.  Have you ever ordered jumbo shrimp on the menu?  Jumbo means big; shrimp means little—totally opposite adjectives, yet combined, they form a delicious food.  What about the phrases “the beginning of the end,” “bittersweet,” and “deep down you’re really a shallow person?”  These examples represent things that are direct contradictions, and yet somehow they aptly describe the situation. 

I opened the bible this morning and I came across a paradox that I’d never noticed before.  It is in the opening chapter of Paul’s letter to the Church at Philippi.  In verse 14 Paul states that most of the brothers, “having become confident in the Lord by my imprisonment, are much more bold to speak the word without fear”.  If you didn’t see the painfully obvious paradox, please re-read it until you do.  I’m in no hurry; I’ll wait.  Got it yet?  Good!  Notice the words in italics.  Paul is telling the Church that the brothers there with him in Rome are becoming more confident because of Paul’s imprisonment and, consequently, are becoming much more bold to speak the Word without fear.  That’s not usually how it goes, right?

Usually, imprisonments are how authorities squash rebellions and uprisings.  I think anyone who has been halfway paying attention to the news this past year has seen what happens when the police fail to arrest rioters.  The rebellions get out of hand and the whole city winds up in complete chaos.  Conversely, when police take charge and arrest the instigators of public demonstrations-gone-awry, the rebellion usually fizzles shortly thereafter.  I’m sure that is what the Pharisees and Roman authorities were thinking when they put Paul imprison.  But, once again, Jesus proves to be the exception and not the rule.

Paul’s imprisonment, and a large dose of the Holy Spirit, only added fuel to the Christians’ fire.  What was meant to be a suppressor became a combustor!  The Christ-haters wanted to snuff out the flame of Jesus, but instead they only poured gas on it!!  Be encouraged my friends!  Remember what Joseph said: “As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today.”  God is in control and He will accomplish His will.  And He is no stranger to the paradox.  In fact, if you look at the entire story of the gospel, it’s nothing but a paradox.  A sinless savior died so that sinful man could live forever!  Praise be to God the Father!  Hallelujah!!

What Song Are You Singing?

Isaiah 40:10 “Sing to the Lord a new song, his praise from the end of the earth”

I’ve always loved music.  In fact, I always aspired to be a musician/songwriter while I was growing up.  So naturally, I was always walking around singing to myself (but usually loud enough for anyone who wanted to listen—and even for those who didn’t).  Well, one of the members of my audience was my mom.  And, needless to say, she didn’t always approve of my choice of music.  I usually listened to rock music with some country thrown in there simply by the virtue of having not one but two country music stations coming out of my little home town.  And, let’s face it, the Christian music of the 90s wasn’t anything like it is now (with the exception of Steven Curtis Chapman and DC Talk). 

On one occasion, Mom told me “Be careful what kind of music you listen to.  It can get stuck in your head.”  Well, of course to a 19 year old, it means nothing to hear your parents tell you something.  You have to figure it out for yourself, right?  So, I decided to run an experiment.  For one week, I would listen to my "normal music".  Then, for one week, I would listen to Christian music.  You know what?  Mamma was right.  I found that during the week, and especially toward the end of the week, that when I woke up and throughout the day, I would catch myself singing the songs that I had been listening too.  I also found that, not only was it in my head, but it affected my mood as well.  When I listened to sappy ballads about broken hearts, I found that I was more heartsick than normal.  When I listened to Praise and Worship music, I was normally in a better mood and more cheerful. 

Some of you might be saying, “Duh!  Now what does this have to do with this blog?”  Well, I’m glad you asked.  Recently, as I’ve been reading through the Psalms, one phrase keeps jumping out at me.  “Sing to the Lord a new song.”  That’s it, a simple little phrase, but it got me thinking about the song I sing to the Lord.  I'm not talking about actual lyrics and a music.  I'm talking about the spiritual song that I'm shouting out with my actions and my attitude.  In Luke 19:40, Jesus says, “I tell you, if these (His disciples) were silent, the very stones would cry out.”  He also says in John 4:23-24, "But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth."  So, even when we aren't speaking, we are crying out something to God.  For the next 15 minutes, I want to us to ignore the things we say, and think about what is pouring out of our minds and hearts as we go through the day.  As we look at Philippians 4:4-9, I want us to think about: (1) What song we should be singing to God?; (2) What song we shouldn't be singing to God?; (3) What influences the song we sing?; (4) How can we ensure we sing the right song?

(1) What songs should we be singing?

      From Phil 4:4-6 I think there are three songs we should be singing.     

The Song of Rejoicing—“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice.”

            Def of Rejoice: to feel or show great joy or delight.  We should be demonstrating our great delight in God for all that He has done for us.  

           --Deuteronomy 12:7 “And there you shall eat before the Lord your God, and you shall rejoice, you and your households, in all that you undertake, in which the Lord your God has blessed you.”

           --1 Chronicles 16:10 “Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice!”

The Song of Peace—“Let your reasonableness be known to everyone.”

           I think that the reasonableness here translates to peaceful.  Someone who is known as reasonable doesn't come across as hot-headed, ill-tempered, or divisive.  

Def of Peace: a state of mutual harmony between people or groups, especially in personal relations: Try to live in peace with your neighbors. I think there are three elements of Peace here:

Be still before the Lord--Stop trying to do it all on your own time table.  Rest in mental and spiritual stillness.

           --Psalm 37:7 “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him”

           --Psalm 46:10 “Be still and know that I am God.”

Be at peace with God--Stop trying to reconcile the sin of your past with God or earn an audience with Him.  Come to him as a completely forgiven child.  

           --Psalm 103:12 “as far as the east is from the west, so far does He remove our transgressions from us.”

Trust God--He is in control anyway.  Yield your life to Him and trust His sovereignty. There is no actual control to be had beyond the control we have to lay down our life.  Any control we think we wrestle away from Him is illusionary. The struggle will only drive us crazy.

            --Prov 3:5-7

            --Jeremiah 29:11

The Song of Thanksgiving—“but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God”

           Def: self-explanatory.  All of our conversations with God should stem from a thankful heart.  Regardless of whether we are in want or plenty, we should always be thankful. We should recognize that God gives us what He wants us to have, not what the world tells us we should have.  That's a key distinction there. 

           --Philippians 4:11-13 “Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me”

(2) What are some songs we shouldn’t sing?

      From Phil 4:6-7, I see three songs we should not be singing.     

The Song of Fear—“The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything”

This one kind of goes without saying.  If we're living in constant fear of the bad that might happen, what good might not happen, or the fear that God will forgot about us, our song is going to sound just like the songs of the lost.  How then will we ever convince anyone of God's goodness.                   

            --Deuteronomy 31:6: “Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you”

--Matthew 7:9-11 "Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!"

The Song of Indifference--"but in everything by prayer and supplication"

God wants our everything.  He doesn't want to us be on autopilot living with no intention at all, just headed whatever direction we're pointed.  Nor does he want us to live life like a pinball, bouncing around from one experience to the next.  He was us to passionately pursue Him.

              --Revelation 3:16 “So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth”
The Song of Why—“And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

I've heard it said that you'll always get the wrong answer as long as you're asking the wrong question.  We spend too much time asking "Why?" in our lives.  We want to know why bad things happen, why God hasn't answered a prayer yet, and why He does what he does.  We aren't asking for understanding.  Instead, it's as if we are saying, "God, I need you to tell me what you're up to so I can let you know if I approve or not."  God doesn't need our approval.  And we don't need to know why.  We just need peace.  God knows what He's doing.  We just need the peace that surpasses understanding.  This will carry us much farther than knowing why.  

            

What influences the songs we sing?

Our Thought Life--Don't buy the lies that satan is telling you.  Use the shield of faith to defend your mind from the fiery arrows of the evil one.  Discipline your mind to focus on God and his truths.  This goes back to the not being on autopilot.  Take charge of your mind and fight the evil one.

           --Philippians 4:8-9: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.”

Our social life--"If you lie down with dogs, you'll wake up with fleas"  It's easier to fall down than to stand up.

            --2 Corinthian 6:14: “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness.”

             --2 Thessalonians 2:6: “Now we command you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you keep away from any brother who is walking in idleness and not in accord with the tradition that you received from us.”

What we Pursue--You can say you love God all day long, but your day planner, checkbook, Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest will shout louder about what you truly worship.

            --Matthew 6:19, 24: “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also…No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money.”

             --Matthew 6:25: “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?”

  

(3) How can we ensure we sing the right songs?

Fellowship--Surround yourself with people who desire to worship and serve God and who are singing the right songs.

             --Acts 2:42, 46: “And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers…And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God

              --Hebrews 13:15 “Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God”

Discipleship--Be involved in bible study with fellow believers that will help you dive deep into God's word.  

              --Proverbs 27:17: “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another”

              --1 Thessalonians 5:13b-18: “Be at peace among yourselves. And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone. Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”

Study--Learn God's word and consume it like your favorite food.

               --2 Timothy 3:16: “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for  reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.”

To close I guess I just want to encourage you to be aware of the song you sing to the Lord.  We need to constantly check ourselves.  Sometimes we may be humming a tune our of habit and not even be aware of what we're singing.  Make sure your song is intentional.  And, just like my music experiment, make sure we aren’t just mindlessly singing worldly songs and complaints, always asking “why?” or for more “stuff” or for relief from situations we’ve gotten ourselves into by making bad choices.  We can call ourselves a sparrow or an eagle, but if we quack like a duck…I guess we’re a duck.

Witnessing

Christ witnessed in every moment of his life.  His every conversation, his every touch, his every response was a witness to how Awesome God is and how much God loves his people.  It sounds like it should be easier than I make it out to be, huh?  I think that's a trick that the devil and our culture play on us.  The devil, the great accuser, points out our flaws and sin and attempts to convince us that our life is inadequate and incapable of pointing someone to Christ.  He tries to shame us into silence. If he doesn't win, then the culture will definitely try to intimidate us.  The PC-ites will tell us that we can talk about Christ because He's "offensive" and "intolerant" so if we want to be liked and not make waves, "we should just keep our religion to ourselves."

Unfortunately, between the two, most of us are nullified.  I read a bible study today that had a great quote in it: "Too often we are more afraid of men than we are of God.  Most men (and women) dread being ridiculed by others."

I'd say that's a pretty fair assessment of our Christian culture.  We lied to by the devil and the world and we back down.  We're content to "let our actions tell our testimony."  While that is true, we should live with integrity, if we truly get who Jesus is (the greatest treasure ever.  Period), then there's no way to be silent about Him.  I'm not saying that we have to wear a sandwich board on the sidewalk and hurl insults at people.  Nor am I saying we have to follow some kind of step-by-step program to "sell" Jesus.  I'm saying it's more simple than that.

I have the ability to share my story in every conversation, every touch, and every response today.  I don't have to hand people a track and read them the Romans road in order to witness to them.  I just have to offer them love and verbalize my gratitude to God for all that He has done for me in my life.  Think about it like this:  If I was on trial as a key witness, I would not be responsible to convincing the jury of anything.  I just have to tell them what I saw.  I just have to tell them my story.  It's up to them to interpret my story.

My point?  Live a life of integrity where your actions line up with your values by all means.  But don't neglect vocalizing all that Jesus has done for you, especially the little stuff, to those you come in contact with.  Our joy in Christ should be spilling out all over people.  If they hate us for it, so be it.  Someone hating us for loving God does not nullify God in our lives.  In fact, I think Jesus said that it magnifies it.

Be blessed today!

The Struggle for Peace

Peace must be pursued.  It doesn't just come to you.  There is nothing passive about a life of peace.  You can't gain peace by osmosis.  You can't inherit peace.  You have to reach for it, chase after it, and hold on tight to it as you live your day-to-day life.
It isn't because the peace itself is fleeting or untamable.  On the contrary.  Peace is readily available for us through the Holy Spirit.  However, it's our own nature and disposition that will try to rip peace away from us.  Our attitude will do anything it can to distract us and keep us from trusting in Christ to be our peace.  Our self will scream for control and constantly tempt us to grab the reigns of our lives.  The problem is, unfortunately, you can't hold onto the reigns and to peace (that is Jesus).  Hence the struggle.
Peace is there, ready for the taking as a result of the Holy Spirit in our lives provided through our relationship with Jesus.  But, we have to be willing to step over the "dead man" (our former selves) to reach it.  Every day, we have to make the choice, do we hang on to us or do we grab on to peace.  Do we consistently and repeatedly drink from the well of life-- the scriptures--and bask in the presence of the author of life--Jesus?  Or do we rely on ourselves from situation to situation?  The choice seems obvious to me.

"Keep moving forward"

Exodus 14:10-15 ESV "When Pharaoh drew near, the people of Israel lifted up their eyes, and behold, the Egyptians were marching after them, and they feared greatly. And the people of Israel cried out to the Lord. They said to Moses, “Is it because there are no graves in Egypt that you have taken us away to die in the wilderness? What have you done to us in bringing us out of Egypt? Is not this what we said to you in Egypt: ‘Leave us alone that we may serve the Egyptians’? For it would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than to die in the wilderness.” And Moses said to the people, “Fear not, stand firm, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will work for you today. For the Egyptians whom you see today, you shall never see again. The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.” The Lord said to Moses, “Why do you cry to me? Tell the people of Israel to go forward."

Background:  God has just performed all of the miracles of the plagues in Egypt through Moses his prophet in order to set the Israelites free from their captivity.

What were the plagues?
1. Plague of blood: Ex. 7:14–25
2. Plague of frogs: Ex. 7:25–8:11
3. Plague of lice or gnats: Ex. 8:16–19
4. Plague of flies or wild animals: Ex. 8:20–32
5. Plague of pestilence: Ex. 9:1–7
6. Plague of boils: Ex. 9:8–12
7. Plague of hail: Ex. 9:13–35
8. Plague of locusts: Ex. 10:1–20
9. Plague of darkness: Ex. 10:21–29
10. Death of the firstborn: Ex. 11:1–12:36.

During these miracles, none of the destruction or devastation affected the Israelites. And, when Pharaoh finally let them go, the Lord gave the Israelites favor in the Egyptians’ eyes to the point that the Israelites were able to plunder the Egyptians on their way out of the land. (Exodus 12:36).

So now, they are marching out of Egypt. God led them as a pillar of smoke in the day and ball of fire at night. And, interestingly enough, He could have lead them on a short cut through the land of the Philistines.  Instead, knowing that if the Israelites encountered war along the way, they’d lose their resolve and want to return to Egypt (Ex 13:17-18), God took them the long way around. Oddly enough, the Israelites left equipped for battle. Maybe they just thought they were prepared, but undoubtedly God knew better.

Have any of you ever looked back and thanked God for taking you the long way around? Did you realize you weren’t as prepared as you thought you were when God started moving you? I know I have. 

So, God is leading them through the wilderness toward the Red Sea. Then, he tells Moses to camp between Migdol (which means large hill, tower, or fortified place) and the Red Sea. God literally stuck them between a rock and a hard place. And, wouldn't you know, He did it on purpose. (Ex 14:2-3)

Why do you think God did that? He was going to harden Pharaoh’s heart so that he would change his mind and pursue the Israelites, thinking they are wondering aimlessly about in the wilderness, and exact revenge for the death of his son and for all the other plagues. Why is this a necessary piece to the story? After all, the Israelites were set free from their slavery. Problem solved, right? Ha, ha...ha

Present:  So, now we come to our passage. The Israelites are sandwiched between the Red Sea and the Migdol. And all of a sudden, here comes 600 of Pharaoh’s chariots, bearing down on them, loaded for bear.

Our Response: How did they respond? Do you think they lost their perspective, and forgot all that they had just witnessed first hand from God? How would you respond? Be honest. Do you think you would be like the Egyptians and forget all of the suffering back in Egypt and all of the miracles that God had done, and wish to be back there in captivity? I can honestly say that I have.

Moses Response:  How did Moses respond to their complaints and fear? What did he tell them to try and shift their perspective? Did he say work harder and try to figure out a way to escape? Did he tell them to prepare for the fight of their lives? Did he tell to save them selves? No! He reminded them who was fighting for them and who was in control. He basically told them to sit back and enjoy the show.

That is the perfect response! Why is it so easy for us to get wrapped up in the obstacles in front of us, even when we know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God has brought us to the place in which we’re standing?

What does James say about our trails? “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” James 1:2-4

Why is our amnesia so quick to set in? Luckily God knows our condition. That is why Moses gives the Israelites the command in Deuteronomy 6:4-9. (Look it up. It's too long to type out.)  We cannot afford to ever forget who God is and what all He has done for us. If we do, we will immediately lose our perspective and put our eyes on us.

Think about Peter and how he walked on water in Matthew 14:28-31. (Come on, look it up already!).  When did he start to sink? When he took his eyes off of Jesus. Didn't he get the answer to his prayer (request of Jesus)? Why did he fear then? Because he took his eyes off Jesus, literally.

God’s Response (the best part):  Does God get mad and punish the Israelites for their instant fear and lack of trust in Him? Does He decide to send them back to Egypt as slaves and revoke their salvation? Nope. Not this time. What does He tell Moses instead? Verse 15 says, “The Lord said to Moses, “Why do you cry to me? Tell the people of Israel to go forward.” He’s already told them that He’s leading them out of captivity. Their job is to keep walking and not to get bogged down with fear, thereby losing focus on the path ahead (aka their PERSPECTIVE). 

He didn’t bring them out to fight and die. He brought them out to be free. All too ofter, we miss the freedom because we're consumed with the fight. Did Jesus die so we could fight? No, he died so we could be free. God will do the fighting for us!!!

Also, He has a purpose for their current situation as well.  He wanted to finish Pharaoh for good as a sign to the Israelites, as well as the surrounding nations, that Israel belongs to God, they are His children, and if anyone mess with them, they will have to deal with Him. It’s important to remember that God does not allow anything to happen, either bad or good, without a plan to redeem it for His glory.

Summary:  No matter what happens as we walk with God, we have to maintain our perspective. "How?," you ask. This is done by always remembering that through Jesus, you are a child of God, and remembering all of the things that God has done for you. That perspective is what will keep you attached to Jesus. Without the perspective that all of whatever is happening in and around you is ordained and purposed by God for His glory, the tendency and instinct will be to sink into self-centered, self-preservation mode. It keeps you looking inward instead of looking upward. If you’re not looking upward, you’re not going to see God. By looking inward, the only little-“g” god you’re going to see is yourself.

So, quit looking down at your trembling knees and...wait for it...KEEP MOVING FORWARD!

 May the Lord bless you with a renewed memory and perspective today and always.

I wanna be in the light!

John 3:20 "For everyone who does wicked things hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his works be exposed." I don't know about you, but I don't like it when I get called out for messing up. Whether it's by accident or as a result of missing the mark in my life, I hate that feeling I get when someone says, "Hey buddy, you sure dropped the ball on that one." My face gets red, my pits get sweaty, and my stomach thinks I'm on the steep drop of a roller coaster. It is humiliating. There is nothing pleasant about having to be corrected. So much so, that lots of people will avoid accountability at all costs. They'll point to others as the cause of their errors. They'll avoid spending time with those loved ones that aren't afraid to confront them. Some will even use drugs, alcohol, or promiscuity to dull their senses to that humiliating feeling of correction. These people would be called fools by proverbial standards. They avoid correction, and thus only compound their folly by continuing to walk in it. I think it's interesting that we often avoid correction that we so desperately need to fix our lives. John refers to people that do wicked things as ones who avoid the light. Of course, his reference to Light means Jesus, who is the light of the world. He is also truth, and not just any truth. He is the truth that sets us free. "Free from what?", you might ask. Free from the fear of humiliating correction. There is nothing to fear in bringing your mess-ups and mistakes to Christ. He won't meet you with ridicule or make you a laughing stock, much like the world will. He will embrace you, and love you. He will correct you through the Holy Spirit's conviction, but it is all in effort to restore you. It is interesting that John talks about hiding from the light and staying in darkness. Light will always overpower darkness. Even the tiniest pinhole can let enough light in to illuminate a pitch black room. In fact, the thicker the darkness, the more pervasive even the most minute beam of light is. And usually, it's that light to which we are drawn. As anyone that's ever been in a pitch black place, searching for a way out can attest, that tiny glimmer of light brings the greatest feeling of hope, relief, and freedom. So it is with the Light of this world. That thing you're doing to numb the nagging feeling (I know it's there because we all have it) that something isn't right isn't going to save you from anything in the long run. It will just prolong the inevitable. Let Christ be your light. Let Him shine in your life. If you've never trusted Christ with your entire life, or just certain pieces of it, what's holding you back? What's the worst that could happen? Christ never killed anyone. He only healed. Be healed and be encouraged! "If Christ is for us, who can be against us?" Have a blessed weekend.

Family Photo Shoot

One of the things I wanted for my 30th birthday was family photos taken. A friend of mine does photography & is fabulous so we finally got in with her (did I mention she was fabulous?!) You all know that a semi-pro photographer is what I want to be when I grow up- or my babies do a bit, for that matter, so I had researched my little heart out for poses & outfits & such leading up to it.

I was so pleasantly surprised due to the fact that little Miss Annsley was loving the wide open space & wanted nothing to do with posing for pictures (unless of course, we didn't want her in the shot) Ahh, the twos are beginning all ready... Anyways, here are a few of my faves!

Peace over understanding

God says he'll give us peace that surpasses (beats, exceeds, overrides, eclipses) understanding. So why does it seem that most of us (or maybe just me), at least initially, beg for understanding when trials come our way? Instead of trying aggressively to decipher how whatever is happening (or threatening to happen) fits into or affects our plans, we should be asking for peace. This peace (calm, serenity, quitetude, stillness) is what will benefit us much more than understanding because it will enable us to continue to focus outwardly on loving others despite the turbulance all around us. Seeking understanding forces us to focus inwardly as we wrestle with self-preservation. So my prayer for me and all of you this week, especially in light of last weekend's events, is that we learn to seek peace immediately and continuously and avoid that crippling quest for "Why?". Have a blessed week!

Welcome back

Time to start blogging again. My year and a half sabbatical is over. Since I blogged last, we've moved to North Carolina, had two more kids, I've changed jobs three times, got selected for Major, started teaching a Sunday School small group, turned 32 and 33, yada, yada, yada...

So, needless to say, I've grown a lot just by virtue of the experiences and changes we've gone through. I will tell you this. God is so much bigger than I thought! His plans are infinitely larger than what my mind can conceive, and his ability to bring those plans to fruition is infinitely stronger than my faith can perceive. His plans are life-long, not just limited to each individual circumstance that I face, even though I try to limit Him to one crisis at a time, as if He is surprised at what is going on in my life.

Also, I've learned that, while my attitude can't inhibit what God is doing in my life, it can definitely: a) hinder my ability to enjoy my life and experience His peace, and b) hamper the leadership that I exude with my family, at work, and as a Sunday School teacher. And, my attitude is completely up to me! I control if I only see the bad or inconvenience in every situation. God only intends experiences for my good (not necessarily my immediate emotional happiness, which is where I get hung up), but I can, by choice, take everything as a punishment or withholding of some sort on His part. Thus, I wear a look that says I just ate some sour grapes.

It's all about perspective. Do I let myself believe the age-old lie that God is conning me and that this experience/possession/achievement is really all that I need to be happy? Or, unlike Eve and Adam, do I tell the devil to take a hake and trust that the Almighty Creator, my Father, has only good intentions for me. It's really not that far of a stretch if you think about it. After all, I'm a dad and I would never, ever do anything to my kids that wasn't for their growth and benefit. And, as imperfect as I am, if I am that way, how much better at it is God? Also, I'm created in the image of God, bearing the Spirit of God, and my tendencies are to bless my children and look out for them (feed, clothe, protect, nurture, educate, LOVE, etc.). Wouldn't those be His tendencies and concerns for His children? Just connecting the dots people...

So, anyway, that's what I've learned over the silent months. I just had some stuff to sort out, you know? Well, I'm glad to be back. I hope you enjoy my ramblings. Please offer your comments, thoughts, points of view, etc. I'd love to learn from you!

"Storms are not an option, but fear is."

Here's a quote for the Max Lucado book "Fearless." I really, really need that book!

This speaks to my heart. I am totally afraid that I won't be able to handle what Storms may come with the Marine Corps. I am afraid and it's clouding my judgment about the reality of the civilian side. I'm not saying it's bad out there, but it's not perfect either and it's not the key to happiness. My attitude and demeanor are. Read this quote from C.S. Lewis.

"Faith...is the art of holding on to things your reason has once accepted, in spite of your changing moods. For moods will change, whatever view your reason takes. I know that by experience. Now that I am a Christian I do have moods in which the whole thing looks very improbable: but when I was an atheist I had moods in which Christianity looked terribly probable...That is why Faith is such a necessary virtue: unless you teach your moods "where they get off," you can never be either a sound Christian or even a sound atheist, but just a creature dithering to and fro, with its beliefs really dependent on the weather and the state of its digestion."

That is so me. I need to make a decision. The decision is not whether or not to stay in the Marine Corps. It is to stop being afraid of what might or might not happen, and trust in Jesus to be there, through the storms. "He who tries to save his life will lose it, but he who loses his life for My sake will find it." Matt 16:25, Mark 8:35, Luke 9:24, John 12:25

I think by trying to get out of the Marine Corps, in my mind, I'm scheming for a way to "save" my life and avoid what I see as unnecessary burdens that detract from what I want and (think that) I need. But, what do I know? God is the only one who knows what "burdens" are necessary to make me the man He wants me to be and the man that my family needs me to be. I can't let fear be the cornerstone in my decision making process. Whether it be fear of failure, burden, or even fear of death. I have to trust that God is in control ultimately and that every storm that I encounter, even the one that will eventually result in my death (even if that "storm" is dying of old age in a nursing home surrounded by my loved ones) is at His command and not simply something I could have avoided if I'd listened to my fear.

Fear is smart. It is conniving. It knows just how to formulate an argument that sounds like the right think to do. It might even appear like godly advice. But, if at the root of the argument, my eyes are on me and not Christ, then the argument holds no water. That is how you can tell if your "advice" is coming from fear of the Holy Spirit. I need to just ask myself, "Who am I concerned about when making this plan? Me or Christ?"

That is a tough question to ask myself. Because, even now, fear is screaming, "Think
of yourself. There's no telling where God will take you if you completely
surrender to Him. God wants you to worry about taking care of yourself and
not do anything that sounds uncomfortable."

Wow! Fear's voice sounds a lot like mine in my head and is disguised as truth, but is actually dripping with selfishness, influenced heavily by modern culture that says, "I before everything."

Even after typing all of this out, I'm still scared to commit. I can't see into the future and I don't want to close any doors that offer possible retreat if it gets too hot. I'm lukewarm, afraid of making a decision in either direction. Unfortunately for me, a lukewarm person is the one thing God chooses to "spit out of His mouth in disgust."

So, conclusion? I'm basing my desire to get out of the Marine Corps on fear and disdain for the unnecessary burdens; basically with "me" in mind. Based on the above dissertation, I'd have to say I need to chose the Marine Corps and trust that Christ is in control and that if He wants me to get out, then He can get me out. I need to worry about controlling my attitude because that is the only thing in this life I can control.

Thanks for listening.

Today's Post

Philippians 3:8-10
"What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider these rubbish, that I might gain Christ and be found in Him...I want to know Christ and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in His sufferings, becoming like Him in His death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead."

I realized that, as I read these verses last night, I can't say that I agree wholeheartedly with Paul. I wish that I could. I desperately want to be able to say that I consider all the worldly possessions and endeavors that I find myself pursuing to be worthless. I wish that I found more enjoyment out of reading the bible and memorizing scripture than I do playing video games and watching TV. I wish that when I was frustrated or upset I wanted to run to the bible and prayer rather than go buy something. But, if we're being honest here, I can't say that. I don't know why. Maybe I just don't understand the magnitude of what Jesus did when He died on that cross and then was resurrected. Maybe I just don't realize how intimately He wants to be involved in my life and how much He wants to show me if only I'd spend my time watching for Him and in fellowship with Him. Maybe I don't have enough faith. After all, whoever wants to please God must have faith, believing that when they come to Him, He hears and answers their prayers.

I don't know why I'm telling you all this. I think I was just stunned by what I didn't know about myself. I mean, there are things that I think are true about me. I have heard this verse before and assumed I believed it. But, after some introspection, I realized that I didn't take it too heart like I should. This is a pretty serious passage with some huge implications. I mean, think about it. Everything we acquire and accomplish is meaningless compared to what we're missing out on if we're not doing it in and through our relationship with Christ. Basically, if it meant that quitting my job, selling everything I own, and becoming a nomadic wanderer was the only way to get closer to Christ, then that's what I'd do. I think Paul meant it that way. Luckily, God doesn't call us to be destitute. He calls us to seek Him above anything else and let Him take care of all the things we so desperately crave.

This passage makes me wonder what else I'm getting wrong. My prayer is that you too would take some time and do some soul searching as you read through the scripture, just to make sure you actually do believe what you profess. If you're as surprised by what you find as I was, then stop right there and pray that the Holy Spirit would show you what you need to do about it.

God bless you all!

This is a poem that the Holy Spirit laid on my heart this morning. I just started typing and in about 15 minutes, there it was. Amazing that He would inspire me like that.

There’s a baby with a heartbeat
There’s a little life inside
It’s not a political agenda
It’s not about women’s rights

Not an accident; no mistake
Not a horrid source of shame
It’s a miracle and a blessing
The greatest gift you can claim

Look at the picture on that black and white display
Listen to the heart beat, the rhythm that it makes

How can you deny that the baby is alive?
Is it just because you can’t hear it cry?
Or is it because you have no room in your life?
Are you too afraid to try?

Does it ease your guilt to say it’s not alive?
Does it make it easier to go to sleep at night?
Do you ever catch yourself wondering if she’d have your eyes?
Or if he’d have his father’s laugh, maybe your mother’s smile?

Does the echo from the empty womb haunt you now and then?
Reminding you of how ultimately selfish that you’d been.
You let society convince you that you could have it all.
And that this little nuisance would only cause you to fall

You lived your life for pleasure, aware of the risks,
And now you act as though you didn’t ask for this.
Slept around as if love was something you could earn
Now you’re with child and that guy is long since gone

You don’t need this, or want this, and so the lie is spun.
You’ve got too much ahead of you to have a daughter or son.
The feminist will tell you it’s a pest, a parasite
Until it’s born into this world, it’s not really alive

But the voice of the one who formed the child inside of you
Is crying out to hold on and listen to the truth
‘Before I formed you in the womb I knew your name.
Before you were born my plans for you had all been laid.”

So calm your heart and hear my still small voice
It’s not late to turn around and make a different choice.
Remember, you’re only here today because your mom’s faith
Gave her the courage to make the choice you’re too afraid to make.

Thoughts on worship

So, I know it's been a long time since I blogged. I just haven't made the time. I could sit here and type out a bunch of excuses about how busy I've been with work, travel, or the kids, but that'd be a lie. The truth is, I haven't made the time. Instead of devoting myself to honing my God-given talent, I have devoted myself to my own entertainment. I spend my evenings watching TV shows that I really don't like and that don't offer any edification to me and my soul. The only saving grace is that I'm usually cuddled up next to Sarah on the couch while watching the brain-melting shows. On the weekends when the family is napping, I play video games instead of letting lose the thoughts swirling around in my head and nawing away at my heart.

I think this is because it is easier to just sit and be entertained. It doesn't take energy and it doesn't take submission to the Holy Spirit. There's no gamble in playing video games, other than my bruised ego when the computer cheats--which it often does--and beats me. But, I don't have to worry about hurting feelings or writing something that doesn't stir up the same emotions in the hearts of those that journey into the recesses of my mind. I don't have wrestle with notions that I'm might be clinging just a little too tightly to, inspite of the Holy Spirit's urging to loose my grip. I don't have to put myself out there.

But, like a singer who refuses to sing because of fear of deaf ears, or a painter not painting for fear of a blind audience, without application I'll never know what God could do through me. No matter the audience, I have to trust that God will hone my gift in a manner that brings Him the most glory. After all, that is why we are each individually gifted, right? You know that right? Our gifts are fitted perfectly for us so that, when in sweet surrender, we are able to bring God the most glory. There is nothing sweeter than being able to worship God through the gifts He's given you. Painters, pick up your brushes! Singers, cry out your melody! Preachers, preach the Good News! Warriors, lace up your boots! Farmers, hitch your plows! Doctors, don your scrubs! Pilots, soar to new heights! Brothers and Sisters in Christ, worship the Lord with all that you are because that is what you were designed for!

All that God wants is all of you, just how He made you. We are free to be who God made us. There are no rules that say we have to be like this or like that. Jesus has set us free to use our gifts to glorify Him without fear or half-heartedness. Giving of ourselves wholly, completely, and unabashedly to Him is our spiritual act of worship. That is authentic worship. If we as a body could learn how to do this, there's no telling what God could do through us. The thought of it is just too exciting!

I'm not talking about using our gifts to glorify us or bring fame and adulation to ourselves. I don't care if I make a penny through my writing or if anyone reads this blog. God will draw men to Himself when we lift His name up. We just need to be ready to use our gifts when God opens opportunity for us. We must remain sensitive to the Holy Spirit's prompting and ensure our talents don't gather dust from being stored upon the shelves of our lifes.

If you are shaking your head right now saying you don't have any gifts, you're doing yourself and God a disservice. Pray that the Holy Spirit would reveal your gift and give you courage to take up the art of worshipping your creator in and through the very manner He gave you to worship Him.

Cry out to God with all that you are by being all that He created you to be!!!

Wow, I didn't sit down expecting to write this blog at all. I was just going to complain about not knowing what I'm supposed to do. Praise the Lord for His inspiration! My the Peace of Christ and the inspiration of the Holy Spirit carry you today! God bless you all.

Questions on 1 John 1 & 2

This blog is going to be a little different. Unlike previous blogs where I pontificate about my thoughts on Jesus and life application, on this blog, I will just basically transpose my notes from Monday night's quite time. I will ask more questions that I have answers for and I will leave them to you to provide your thoughts on. So, at the very least, it might be shorter. Here goes.

The Message (That's what I entitled it.)

-God is light! In Him there is no darkness!
-What darkness? Sin? Confusion? Despair? Shame? Guild? Hopelessness? Lies? Hate?
-What is light? Knowledge? Truth? Hope? Joy? Peace? Pretty much the opposite of darkness?

"If we say we have fellowship with Him (God), and walk in darkness, we Lie and don't practice the truth. But, if we walk in the Light, as He (God) is in the light, we have Fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin."
-Is this referring to us and God, or us and fellow believers?
-So does this mean that if we aren't walking in the light, then we can't be in fellowship with God or eachother, and therefore, aren't under the cleansing power of Jesus' blood?

"Now by this we know that we know Him (God), if we keep His commandments (Love the Lord God with all your heart, mind, and strength; Love your neighbor as yourself. Right?)."
"He (me) who says, "I know Him (God)," and does not keep His commandments is a liar, and the truth (Light?) is not in him (me). But whoever keeps His word (commandments??), truly the love of God is perfected in him (me). By this we know that we are in Him (God).""
-What does that mean "love of God is perfected?" Isn't God's love already perfect in Himself?
-This is speaking of confidence and assurance in our relationship with God by keeping His commandments.

"He (me) who says he (me) abides (what does this mean?) in Him (God) ought himself (me) also to walk just as Jesus walked.
-What is the action there?
-Is that more "Christian" speak?
-Does this refer back to "abide"?

"He (me) who says he (me) is in the light (there's that word again), and hates his brother, is in darkness until now?
-What's the litmus test for deciding what "hate" is? Is it subjective?
-Who is my brother? Fellow Christian? Jesus? All human-kind?
-Until now???

"He (me) who loves his (me) brother abides (there's that word again) in the light (truth), and there is no cause for stumbling in him."
-Does this mean that if we love our brother and live in fellowship with our brother (again, who is our brother) that we won't sin? Is it a cause and effect thing?

"But he (me) who hates his brother is in darkness and walks in darkness and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes."
-Whoa! Lots of reference to darkness, hate, and brother.

I need help defining:
-Darkness
-Light
-Love
-Hate
-Abide
-Brother
-Walk

So, anyway, that was my quite time. I still don't have answers. But, I'll keep staring at it until some form of wisdom overcomes me. Take care!

Catching up

So, for those of you who actually read this blog, you might notice that it's been a while since my last post. The reason is simple. It isn't that I don't care anymore or that I don't enjoy writing. The fact of the matter is that Sarah moved the computer into the front office and I am never in the front office. So, the computer is out of sight. Naturally, that makes it out of mind. I can't get the blog at work now either. I guess the man is on to me!

Well, a lot has happened around me in that past month. I can't say that it has happened to me, as nothing really is going on with me. There has been a lot of shake up around me though. My wife is pregnant with our third child. This is even more significant than normal because it is our post-vasectomy reversal baby. Yea, not once, but twice did I prove my devotion to myself. Don't worry, though. I'm not devoted enough for to go for the hat trick.

Also, Capt America and his wife found out they were expecting their first child. Good for them! Then, Capt America's travel agent got it all screwed up. She got confused and sent him to Afghanistan instead of Acapulco. Oh well, honest mistake. It's only for a few months, so I'm sure he'll get over it. Mrs. Capt America, on the other hand, might not. My son turned 3 on Easter. That will make you feel old when your second child hits the big 3. Even worse is when you find yourself actually chanting in a restaurant, "You went big boy potty! You went big boy potty!" Yea, as disturbing in real life as it is in your head.

So that's what has happened around me. Not much to me. Still plugging away at the new job and trying to accept my inevitable career in the Marine Corps.

I picked up my guitar today and started fiddling with a new song. I found a cool tune and started mumbling whatever words came to mind, if any. That's kind of how I do it. I find a cool rhythm and just hum along until some words come to mind. I keep playing until the words form a song and I have to stop and write them down before they escape me. Well, tonight, not much came in the form a verse, but a chorus kind of settled in. It went like this:

Wait.
Just wait.
Hold onto the faith I've given to you.
Wait.
Just wait.
Hold on My hand; I'll carry you through
Wait.

I don't know if anything will come of it, but I sure felt a peace after playing for a little while. Peace knowing that God can and will come through in whatever it is than I'm fearing He won't. We just have to wait. Not a faithless, hopeless, pessimistic waiting. No, that would be no good. We need to wait expectantly, knowing that God is bound by nothing, and nothing will keep Him for unfolding His plan for those who wait eagerly for Him.

"Be still and know that I am God."
"Cease your striving and know that I am God." -Psalm 46:10

Conduit? But I don't know if I "con-do-it!"

So I was thinking to myself the last few days. I said, "Self, how do you think we're supposed to reach the world for Christ?" My self didn't have a response. Go figure! So, without an answer to cling too, I began to ponder this more and more.

If you've sat in a Baptist church in the past, oh I don't know, 40 years, you've probably heard the term "witness." To those who know, we recognize that this term means to "tell people about Jesus." After all, that makes sense, right? We should be telling people about Christ. We should be telling them how awesome He is and how much He's done for us in our lives. We should also tell them that without Him, they can't get to God. We should tell them how He loves them and died for their sin as well so that, if they'd just turn to Him, He'd forgive them and offer them a place in His kingdom. We should tell them that that void they're trying to fill can never be filled up by what they're trying to fill it with. It can only be filled by allowing Jesus to fill it up with Himself. We should be telling people about all of this. But...

I haven't found that many opportunities to do that lately. I find myself feeling more like I'm selling a product rather than talking about this personal Savior that I know and interact with constantly. Plus, I'm a little afraid of confrontation. It seems a lot of people aren't looking to be enlightened. They're looking for a fight, in which they can prove themselves right and all "Christians" wrong. So I started thinking, "Why do people want so badly to argue with us and reject the idea of learning about Christ?" Why are they so angry at us? Here's what I came up with. While sharing the Gospel is one of our chief directives, I believe the first and foremost is to be a conduit for Jesus to share His love with people.

People who don't know Jesus can easily deny His existence, thereby dismissing any "logic" we might be able to share with them. But, they can't deny our existence. They can see, hear, touch, and interact with us. So, we are the closest thing to Jesus they're going to see here on Earth. Therefore, we must be His conduit to them. We must position ourselves in a place where they can experience the love of Christ flowing through us. If we're too busy judging them by making assumptions about what they think, feel, believe, or where they've come from and where they're going, we lose the ability to truly connect with them and lay the foundation through which we can convey Christ's love to them.

By accepting them as they are, just like Christ accepted us, and showing them love and serving them, we begin to build trust. They see that we really do care about them and we're not just trying to make a sale. If you look through the Gospels, I think you'll find that Jesus was always patient, compassionate, and a loving servant to the lost. It was the supposed "religious experts" that He was hard on. These were the ones who didn't get it.

So what am I saying? I don't know. Maybe I'm just rambling. I just know how I treat telemarketers. I know exactly who's on the phone when I answer a call from an unknown caller and hear that pause and someone comes on the line and asks for a "Mr. H-A-G-A-R." It's a dead giveaway that they don't know me and that they're just trying to sell me something. I instantly tune them out and look for my first opportunity to cut them off, tell them to leave me alone, and hang up on them. (I know, not the best way to be a conduit, but I'm trying.) Don't you think it's the same for the lost people who maybe haven't been brought to that broken place in their lives yet where they are searching for God. Suddenly some stranger walks up to a person and hands him or her a track on the dangers of drug use and that turning to God is the only way to break the habit. What would you think if you were that person? I know what my friend thought when it happened to him. He was offended. First of all, because he knows the Lord; second of all, he doesn't use drugs and has family issues due to drug and alcohol use. The message was not received.

Don't we do that all the time? We make assumptions about people and their status before we even take the time to get to know them. To be a conduit, we need to reach out to them first, regardless of our initial impression (unless the initial impression is that they want to cause you harm. Use your best judgment should that happen.), and try to see how God is working on them and how we can best meet their needs, whatever that might be. I'm not saying that we need to participate in their lifestyles if they are obviously doing things that are in direct contrast to how the Word says we should be living. But, we can find a safe ground to love them on, so that we meet them where they are at and minister to them without falling into temptation ourselves.

Ok, this is really getting out of hand. So, I'll just leave you with this. How are you going to convince someone that Jesus is real and worth serious consideration if that person doesn't trust you and hasn't witnessed any of this love you're telling them that Jesus has for them? God bless you as you try and understand how God would have you interact with those whom He's put in your path. They might be closer than you think.

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging symbol. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing." 1 Corinthians 13:1-3

Fresh Eyes

So, I was out on my patio enjoying the wonderful evening, smoking a very nice cigar, courtesy of my father-in-law, and a drinking a really good beer (Brooklyn Lager...shout out to my friends from NY). It was really peaceful. So peaceful in fact that I had time to just sit and listen to the evening and watch my family through the sliding glass door, and just enjoy watching them without worry about a meeting or checking my blackberry. It was nice and a little overdue if you know what I mean. I started praying for my brother Goldie and my close-as-brothers Deerhunter and MochaBear. (In case you haven't realized, I've changed the names of the innocent to protect their identities.) I was really praying for them because they're all deployed right now, two on ships, and one in Iraq. I was praying obviously for their safety, but more importantly that they'd know that their families miss them. We all have two kids each, all between the ages of 5 and 2 weeks. And we all are in desperate love with our families. I pray for them as often as I can. I can empathize with them because I was once in their shoes. So I know how hard it is to watch your kids grow up in pictures, especially when you live to interact with them, to hold them, and love on them. So, if you have a moment in your day not filled with chaos, please stop and pray for them.

Anyway, so after I came back to earth, I saw my wife walking around, entertaining the kids and our guests, Mrs. Mochabear and her kids. And how much I loved her just hit me. I really saw her through fresh eyes. My wife is beautiful, charming, hilarious, caring, giving, full of infectious optimism, honest, loving, beautiful, intelligent, challenging, and my biggest fan. She truly is everything that I never knew I wanted, and all that God knew I needed. I was just overwhelmed with love and, more importantly, appreciation for her. I say appreciation is more important because, as most of you know, it is really easy to overlook all the things that our spouses do for us. I reflected on the past few weeks and God revealed to me many times when I got mad at her for no reason whatsoever. She does nothing all day long but consider other people, whether it be kids or me or her friends. Yet, I have the gall to become offended if, heaven forbid, she doesn't read my mind and know exactly what I need without me having to voice it. I felt really convicted for my quiet resentment and I prayed for forgiveness. I'll ask for her forgiveness later this evening.

That conviction really opened my eyes even more. I began to see myself through fresh eyes. I really came to see how truly selfish and self-absorbed I've been, pretty much for the past 10 years. (Give or take a few years.) I have been overly concerned with what God has in store for me and what it's going to cost me. I have tried like crazy to avoid inconvenience, to minimize commitment that costs too much, and to not get too over-involved in other people's issues. Whoa!!! And I'm supposed to be following Christ? So, again, I prayed for forgiveness and began to count my blessings, blessings that were bestowed on me, despite my narcissistic tendencies.

Wow! Think about that. In spite of all that bad that we do, or the good we don't do, God still reigns down His blessings. Heck, He even died for us when we were the worst possible versions of ourselves, lost and living in a destructive relationship with darkness. He reached out, grabbed up, dusted us off, cleaned us up, and took us in His arms, never to turn loose of us. Our only requirement is to love Him in return more than we love ourselves, believe in Him, and stay in His arms. Everything else, the loving others, sharing our faith, tithing, worshipping Him is simply an outpouring of that love for Him. If we aren't doing those things, that fruit, if you will, then we must ask ourselves, "Am I loving God more or me?" Falling in love with God is just like falling in love with my wife. It is a daily decision that I can totally screw up if I'm not careful to put her needs first. Same with God. If I don't daily make that commitment to love Him more, then I'll lapse back into my narcissism and my spiritual muscles atrophy. It's no different that my physical muscles atrophying from a lack of use. The same theory applies to marriage and loving God.

But, at the end of the day, just like the gym is still there waiting on me, and my wife is still there lying next to me just wanting to be loved and appreciated, God is waiting for me to hop back in His arms, snuggle up against His chest, and let Him take care of me. Isn't it just crazy! Wow! It just blows my mind.

When was the last time you looked at yourself through fresh eyes? What about your spouse? What about God? It is truly an "eye-opening" experience. (Pun totally intended.) If it's been a while, maybe you should consider trying. What have you go to lose?

"You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly...But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:6, 8

Yes, Jeremiah 29:11 again. (No comments from you Austin)

So, there I was re-reading my previous blogs when I discovered that I used the same verse two blogs in a row. Apparently, my editorial skills are not quite that sharp yet. Getting past my feelings of sheepishness, I began to analyze how that happened. You know, that verse is pretty pertinent for what I'm facing in a lot of areas of my life right now. Finances, career, parenting, you name it and I can find a way in which this verse brings inspiration. Let's take a look.

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you, not to harm you; plans for a hope and a future."

Just say that out loud a few times. Think about each phrase between the commas. Chew on those for a moment. This is really remarkable! This verse really speaks to me that no matter what it is I worry about--and I do worry more than I should--it is going to be ok. The situation might not be what I picture and when I picture it to be, but it is going to be perfect because it is meant for not only my good, but for my prosperity. That means the same for you. No matter what your facing, it is meant for your prosperity and it is personalized for you from God. They're God's plans. We don't have to come up with them on our own. We don't have to strategize. We just have to turn to God and ask Him to reveal them to us. There is no burden on us other than to trust the Lord. I often get bogged down, worrying about what the future holds and if I'll survive it. What a waste of energy! Jeremiah 29:11 promises that if I will get out of the way and let Him puts His plans in motion, not only will I be ok, but I'll prosper and have a future. Look out Joel Osteen!

But Garrett, what does that look like? How do I apply that? Oh what, you think just because I'm writing this blog that I have the answers? You'd think. Unfortunately, I don't. But, fret not. I do have something to share that might, at least, point you in the right direction.

I can't tell you what trusting God and letting Him institute His plans, because that is really between you and Him. But, I can tell you what God's been laying on my heart. I waste a lot of time and mental energy trying to solve the puzzle of my future. You know, I could be using that energy to mediate on Jesus' words, praying for other people in my life, and asking God to show me how I can just love people more. I think that last one is really the key and maybe the second to last one because of how it feeds into focusing on others. I really think there is something big disguised in that small package (focus Austin). What are we really here for? Yea, I know the Sunday School answers. But really think about it for a second.

Done? Here's what I think. It is truly to love God and love others. If we love God, we obey Him. He commands us to love others as yourself. So, by loving others, we love God. Loving others as yourself means exactly what it says. It can look like serving and demonstrating compassion toward them. It can also be seen in giving and maintaining relationships.

So, short story long. Don't waste your time worrying about what the future holds. Instead, spend that time asking God to show you how to love others, especially those whom you don't find it natural and easy to love. Then, you won't be getting in the way of the future plans.

God bless you. Hager out!

Nothing to say

So, I'm sitting here staring at this computer screen because Austin has been giving me a hard time about not keeping up my blog. But what else is new. All he does is give me a hard time. So, why am I trying so hard to put keys to screen (the tech version of putting pen to paper)? I don't know. I feel like I should say something encouraging, something uplifting to inspire the two of you that read this blog. But, I really don't know what to say. I can't think of anything deep. I'm too busy being inundated with this shallow, superficial TV show called the Bachelor. This stupid show this is nothing more than an experiment in human depravity. How can anyone like this show? It's ridiculous! Only one couple has made it in over 10 seasons. How is that evidence that this show works. All it does is set people up to get hurt. Do they really expect a guy to fall in love with one girl when they throw 25 of them at him and take them on these unrealistic dates that would never happen in real life? Of course not! They are playing to the weakness of man. Sex. Sex doesn't equal love and rarely precedes love. They are also playing to the weakness of women by promising this fairy tale romance that is completely unrealistic. They use these people to boost ratings. But, the craziest part is that people keep subjecting themselves to this experience.

We poor lost people. So lost in the pursuit of that one thing, that one decision, that one opportunity that will magically make our lives perfect. That one "magic" pill doesn't exist. The fact of the matter is that we live in a fallen world full of heartache and pain and misery. There is only one fairy tale. It's the story of a creator that was so in love with His creation, that in the midst of their depravity, He shed His crown, stepped down from His throne, and became one of us. He lived a life that we are incapable of living and then let us crucify Him for the very sins we've committed. Then He rose again so that we could be reunited with Him in Heaven when our lives on this earth are over.

The hard part is having to endure this life. There are wonderful gifts and blessings that God gives us, but the perfect fairy tale romance is not one of them. It can never be because a relationship involves the union of two imperfect people. The problems arise when we start basing the correctness of our situation based on these false images of how life "should" be. Our hearts are deceitful and fickle and can't be trusted left to their own desires. Only God knows our hearts and knows who we really are. The trick is trusting Him to reveal the life He has for us in His time. Will you let me know when you figure out? Thanks. God bless you guys.

Now leave me alone Austin!