Mental Dominos...

So, you ever seen those professional domino builders? You know the ones that line up thousands of dominoes to see how many they can line up before they fall down and cause the "domino effect." The current world record is over 4,340,000! That's insane! It took approximately 90 builders 8 weeks of continuous building to create this monstrosity.

I realize this is an odd bit of trivia, but I think it's more relevant than it might first appear. I had a conversation with a friend this weekend, and as the conversation progressed, the Holy Spirit laid on me an epiphany. I work out my faith like a dedicated domino builder. Here's the back story.

So, we were talking. I was kind getting after this person because I feel like they've been post-poning a decision. They're really at a fork in their life, and they've been lingering there for a while. I get the fact that this person's torn between all that they have been taught and what they're experiencing in their life on a daily basis. It is tearing this person apart. I feel for this person. I really do!

So anyway, I listen to this person give me the litany of reasons why they don't want to remain and then the myriad of things that must fall into place BEFORE they will move. In fact, it will take these things being put in place in an observable way before they'd considered it a direction from God. It was at this point that the Holy Spirit laid on me the analogy of lining up "mental dominoes" before we're willing to follow God. This person is really hurting but can't make a decision because the dominoes aren't lining up! Does any of this sound familiar?

Well, enter epiphany stage right. As I'm laying out to this person how silly it is that this person's unwilling to follow God because they can't trust that God will provide for this person outside of these dominoes that this person's picked out, I'm totally convicted that that is exactly how I live my life.

These mental dominoes I'm talking about are the things that we think we need in our lives to survive. It can be things like a certain salary, location, job, standard of living, presence of a child...you get the picture. We think we have to have these dominoes in place before we'll step out an follow God. In fact, we're unwilling to accept a word from God without these visible things in place.

For me, it's whether or not to stay in the Marine Corps for a career or to get out. Well, when my wife and I talk about getting out, the conversation inevitably turns to where we have to live, how much I have to make, what kind of house we have to have, enough money to travel once a year, etc, so that we can maintain some arbitrary standard of living. These things have to be lined up before we'd be willing to believe that God is calling us there. Hello??? On the other hand, I act the same way toward staying in the Marine Corps. I act as if God should provide me an easy career that doesn't require a lot out of me. I want to know that I won't deploy or have a bad boss, yada yada yada. I don't see that I am limiting what I'm allowing God to do in my life because of my lack of faith. I'm not the only one that sees a problem with that logic, am I?

By focusing on these dominoes and waiting for them to be lined up before we step out in faith, we're totally dismissing the fact that God knows way better than we do about what we'll need to do His will. If you look in the bible, God calls people to follow Him long before he reveals where they'll go or what they'll be doing. He just says, "Go." It is our job to let Him be God and put the burden of providing for us on His shoulders. I can relate to the burden of provision when I think back to those conversations about getting out. After about 30 minutes of domino building, I'm so overwhelmed and discouraged, that getting out looks less and less like a viable option for our lives. So, I decide that it's impossible and I reluctantly resign to believing that our path is going through the Corps for a career. But my hearts longs for something more, although right now I'm not quite sure what that is. But I continue to short-changing God by losing hope that my dominoes will ever line up and give me a clear path out.

I don't think it works like that. We just need to be sensitive to the Spirit and be honestly and whole-heartedly willing to follow Him no matter where that takes us. Luckily for me, I'm not a crossroads yet. I'm just trying to anticipate the decision, which is a whole other blog entry. My friend, on the other hand, must make a decision now. I left them with the same advice I left for myself and that I'll leave for you now.

Sit in a quite place, put away the devotional and sermon notes, open the bible, and truly seek God. Ask Him to reveal to you any dominoes you might be holding onto, whether consciously or subconsciously. Then, ask Him for the strength to let them go. Then ask Him to help you put that trust back in Him. Remember Jeremiah 29:11. Claim that verse. I don't think God asks us to carry a burden that will make us miserable just to make us pious. Jesus loves us! He wants the best for us. But, He is the only one who knows what's best for us, and if we'll get out of the way, He'll show us. God bless you all and remember, life's about being loved by God and returning that love. Peace to you all.

"For I know that plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you, not to harm you; plans for a hope and a future." Jer 29:11

Seriously! 3 months since your last post? Seriously!

So, anyway, as you can see, I am not the best at keeping up my blog.  But, just so you know NMCI did finally wise up and put this particular blog site on it's disallowed list.  But, that probably only happened a month or so ago.  If you can get past the anger and harbored resentment, then I think we can move on.  

Well, what has happened since our last conversation?  What hasn't happened?!?!  We rearranged our house again.  Yes we did!  Hard as it is to believe, it was actually a mutual decision and one that should have been made a long time ago.  This particular arrangement works the best of the previous 5 we've tried!  I sold my black T-bird and bought a tank!  Not a real tank, an '87 Jeep Grand Wagoneer Woody that is Aggie Maroon!  My sister-in-law is so jealous that she's offered me a straight up title swap for her Trailblazer XL.  I told her, "Hey, I might be Grand Wagoneer old, but I'm not even close to SUV-that-wants-to-be-a-minivan old!"  (That's right!)

What else?  Oh yeah, we put our house on the market as a short sale.  Yea us!  We had to list it for $100k less than we owe, so that is obviously going to be great for my credit, right?  But, praise the Lord, we got an offer for more than our asking price after it being on the market a day.  We've already submitted our short-sale request, so we'll see how it goes!  I make light of this situation, but we did pray a lot about it.  I was raised that you take responsibility for your actions, no matter the consequences and you stick it out.  But, we really had a peace about this and really, it all miraculously fell in place in less than a week.  So, we're just kind of along for the ride now as God carries us through the rest of the short-sale process.  We move out into a rental house at the end of the month. 

So, I'm applying for a new position in our organization at work.  I just heard from the Colonel that I bombed my first interview, but that he's giving me a re-do.  So, if you could remember me in your prayers at 0900 on Thursday, I'll be getting raked over the coals again.  

Spiritually, I am on a quest to find out what real Christianity and faith and being in love with Jesus is all about.  I've been told what it is about all my life, but I don't think I've ever searched on my own.  I want to know the real Jesus and be in love with him, not a program, a service, a building or a published doctrine.  I started reading a book called Blue Like Jazz.  So far, it is right on the money for how I feel and is highly recommend by three dudes I respect a lot.  Don't worry, I'm not going AWOL from my faith or church, I just want to get it right, you know.  In fact, we've gone back to OBC.  It is so refreshing to see so many people that we love and that love us, but that we haven't seen in seven months or so.  We picked up right where we left off.  In fact, it was the same time as the housing situation took place.   So, I feel we're back where we need to be.  

Ok, I think that summary about wraps it up.  Cool ride.  New house. Bad credit.  Fresh faith.  Am I forgetting anything?  Oh yea...

Verse of the Day

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know that plans I have for you declares the Lord; plans to prosper you, not to harm you; plans for a hope and future."

Sarah read this to me throughout the week that the housing situation was going on.  So, I think it's applicable for this entry for obvious reasons.  No matter what my credit score is, what kind of ridiculous anti-stimulus package is passed, or where I work, God is real, concerned, and involved in my life and in yours.  It doesn't matter what it looks like, God is in control.  He is incapable of letting you (or me) down.  It's not even an option.  Seek Him, be blessed today, and be a blessing to someone else.  

Hager out!